Abusive People Can Handle Any Amount Of Pressure

If you've spent much time on planet Earth you have run into or had someone you know run into an abusive person.

Abusive people come in numerous sizes and flavors.

Whether they are emotionally abusive and manipulative, playing games to use your feelings as a weapon to control you through cunning.

Whether they are mentally abusive where they keep you stuck in the eternal present, unable to remember anything before today so they can brainwash you and control you.

Whether they are sexually abusive or physically abusive in hurting you.

Whether they are cheating on you, betraying you by giving to other people what they have no want to give to you.

Regardless of the sheep's clothing, wolves are wolves.

But there is something many people don't stop to think about. It's that making life harder for abusive people doesn’t change them. Making life harder for them doesn’t wake them up. Making life harder for them doesn't make them have good will towards you.

Abusive people have spent their lives juggling lies, gaslighting, manipulating and hurting people. They are in fact problem solvers, highly skilled social escape artists, and masters of deflection.

So that raises the obvious question.

How do you fight back against abusive people?

The answer is simple, not easy, and can be terrifying if we're being honest.

The way to fight back against abusive people is to expose them.

Social knowledge of who they are, who they really are, is often the only weapon that works on them. Shining a light on them, the light of truth and public exposure, whether that's the community or just family and immediate social circles.

But once you start thinking about that, you arrive at the hard part. What can be the terrifying part. Because exposing your abuser means you have to also expose... yourself.

You have to expose what’s been done to you. You have to expose how you continued to accept the abuse until now. You have to expose what you allowed to happen to your kids or family.

And that’s all terrifying, for absolute sure.

And we all need to acknowledge that. The cost to the victim is real. It’s very real.

But if you are in that awful place, you should ask yourself this:

How much MORE of this am I going to let happen to me and my family, by continuing to avoid the shame of exposing the abuse?

How much more is "OK" to you?